With it being not only a new year but a new decade i felt it would be a good time to reflect on the past year and decade.
On a whole the past decade has been a great one. Our kids have grown up and life is a lot easier then when they were little and we were raising them. Although ralphs jobs had lots of cut backs and hes had to take pay decreases and also lose his overtime on the whole we still get by. We still are able to enjoy trips together and have a modest nice home. I have been working at my job for the past nine years and im lucky that i not only love my job but i also love the people i work with. They are great co workers and great friends. A year ago going into 2009 i felt i was very blessed and very very lucky i really felt i had it all. We had also just become grandparents and 2009 we felt was going to be an amazing year. The year did start off with a couple of surgerys for me which was very hard and i came out of that really knowing who my friends were in life. lol. The support i recd from co workers and friends and my kids and hubby will never be forgotton. Sadly i also found out when i was recoveing who wasnt to be trusted. A few rather then ask how i was doing decided to instead use my weaken moments to try to cause me hurt and grief. In march i had an amazing trip with my three daughters and Lucys drill team to New York City, it was just amazing. I hope we get another chance one day to do an all girls trip. Then on April 7th my whole world fell apart when i heard my mum properly had cancer, she had kept it to herself for three months rather then worry us. Since then its been a roller coaster of hospitals, chemo, treatments, hope and heartbreak. The hardest part is being so far away from her. I just want to be there with her holding her hand and helping her everyday. But due to Ralphs job being so un certain i need to keep my job and work full time. I also have kids still in high school and Lucy being on the Minerettes is in itself a full time job. That does end in march and that will free up more time for us. I was able to go to England with Heather in July for a couple of weeks and did spend a wonderful few weeks with my parents. At that time she wasnt feeling too bad and we were able to visit a lot of places and do some amazing things. I took her to see Wicked for her 71st birthday. Its created memorys for us all that will last forever. End of april it was confirmed that it was lung cancer but surgery would fix it as she was so fit. May 21st it was found to have spread to her brain and nothing could be done. So all the chemo started to at least help the lung. In September they came up with a pill that had a chance of breaking away both cancers. She seemed to be doing so well and most of the lung cancer has in fact gone though chemo. On Nove 9th they found it had spread to her liver and possibly her bones so they took her off the pill that wasnt working like we had all hoped for. The sad thing is its pretty much gone from the lung but sadly has spread to other places. I never had any idea of the ups and downs of cancer before this and it really does tear away at your life. My dad though the stress of it all had a mini stoke on Nove 15th and by some miracle both traveled out to us for a month in Dece even tho both there doctors would have prefered them not too. It was wonderful having them here and having them meet there great grandbaby Leland for the first time who turned a year old why they were here. Lucy also did a heartbreaking solo of Celine Dions A New Day for her grandma, its her grandmas fave song and of course my mum cried and cried when she saw it. It also created memorys for us that will never be forgotton. Letting them go home was the hardest thing i have ever done but they need health care which sadly isnt available for everyone in this great and powerful country so they had to go home in order to get the care they need. In October we also found out we will be grandparents again to our other son and wife sometime in June and we are thilled to meet and love that baby also. So its been a good and horrible year. We have found though these many trials this year that people we hardly knew have stepped forward to offer love and support to us in both countrys and then people we thought we would get support from have turned on us and acted totally out of line. Why these people have contined this whole year to act in such a cruel way at a time when my whole life is breaking is beyond me and i really dont have the time to worry and try to figure it out. My attention and concern needs to be elsewhere. The only choice was to totally cut them out of my life and block them from avenues they were using to create problems. I dont have time to worry about why they behave that way its easier to cut them out and be done with it. I am forever grateful for all the people that have been there for us this year you really do find out who your true friends are when you go though surgerys or the trauma of cancer in a family member. My mum i am just amazed at and i admire her sooo much. Though all of this pain and heartbreak for her all she worrys about is the rest of us worrying about her. Her thoughts are always what this is doing to us and yes its hell i admit but for her to be so brave and strong with what shes going though is a constent amazement for me. I love both my parents so much and its killing me watching them go though this and not being able to help them on a daily base. I envy people so much that can see there parents anytime or with just a tank of gas, lol. I hope they never take it for granted and they know how blessed they are.
My wishes for the new year is the hope that my mums cancer will somehow go in remission and she will feel healther and can have a better quaity of life. I hope she can be with us a long time she has a big family that love her and wants to share there lifes with her. She never had a sick day in her life before this and is way to young to be going though this. Its very hard also seeing what this is doing to my dad. Im grateful for my brother and sister in law over there that are helping them though this. Also for my extended family over there and people ive never met that have contacted me that want to help them with meals and rides to hospitals. Ive found angels come from everywhere when you go though such a terrible time.
So thats been our year and decade. The good and the bad. Our hopes for next year and the next decade is to have good health, to hope for a mircale and to spend time with the people we love.
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